Maybe I'm a robotist.  Maybe in 50 years we'll be inaugurating a half-robot, half-latino president with a Japanese sounding name.  Maybe then I'll be viewed as a robotist in the same we all have to painfully attempt to laugh with our grandparents when they talk about African Americans.

But for right now I hate the Fox NFL Robot.  I especially despised his recent performance during the Cardinals and Eagles game on Sunday. For those of you who saw the game, why the hell couldn't they give him more than one animation? After every commercial break we have to watch this robot wave his checked flag around. Sure, it might have approached cute the first time, but every time after that was just painful.

Furthermore, I'm not sure if Fox is aware of this, but there are no checkered flags in football! Much like crying doesn't belong in baseball; no one is crossing a finish line in football. If football involved a finish line then we wouldn't have 300+ lb linemen, and that would be a damn shame.

It should be obvious that Fox was gearing up for their Daytona coverage, which is a fine thing to do. But everyone was already aware that Fox was covering the Daytona 500 because they showed an ad every single commercial break…we don't need that message reinforced with a robot who has exactly one animation is his Sunday afternoon repertoire. Be a little creative, have him drive around a little robot car or have him changing a tire or have him smocking 3 packs of cigarettes while wearing his John Deer hat. Add a little spice, ya know?

I haven't fully explained why the Fox robot was so horrible on Sunday yet. Here's why: he was waving a checkered flag for no one. He was just waving it. No cars were going by, no horses, no Lance Armstrongs, nothing. Now that's just silly.